2010-06-30 / Speak Your Piece

Speak Your Piece

I was calling in to make a comment on American Electric Power. The way I see it is that Edison Banks should sue them. We poor people don’t have a chance out here for the rich people taking from the poor. All we’ve got is a monthly check. I think it’s a shame that everybody takes from the poor.

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So now you are divorcing your husband because he found out about your filthy past 30 some years ago, what you did when you were pregnant with a kid? Now you’ve got to divorce him, but that is not going to clear your name of what you have done. I don’t think you will ever live on this side of the mountain. If you do, take his house because you can’t show your filthy face on this side of the mountain, you filthy slut.

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Anyone that would make such a stupid statement should be in a mental institution. And anyone that gets all shook up over what was said should be in a mental institution with them.

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Everyone should love their mom. Yes, things go wrong in life. Nothing is perfect, not even a mom. Everyone makes mistakes. You should forgive and forget. And if you are an adult, well, you need to grow up and quit ignoring your mom. Tell her that you love her because she may not be here tomorrow. You need to forgive and forget.

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Marijuana? Really? Danny Webb, I know you personally, and you cannot believe the pot shown and described in that picture and story about the drug bust is worth $250 dollars in it’s present state, let alone $250,000. This is the sorriest excuse for a pot bust I have seen in years. In September, ‘if’ this pot got 10 feet high and had buds of the highest quality, it would only bring part of the valued price, and it would have to be sold in another state. It is not worth the gas you spent in the cars to get there and cut it, or pull up the six-inch plants that are not in the picture. Now here are some more ‘if’ items: If the groundhogs and deer didn’t eat most of it as they do, and if the pot thieves didn’t steal most of it as they do, and if the weather was perfect for growing, and if it is from good seeds and had a magnifi cent THC content, and if and if, it might be worth part of the money the deputies valued it — and then only if it was all sold, and if there was a buyer. Danny Webb, I know you are much too smart to have let that estimate be published ‘if’ you knew about it beforehand. This is like the old story, ‘if’ a frog had wings it wouldn’t bump its behind every time it jumped. Your office needs to get smart and do like the Flying Circus: Spot the pot growing in June and go back in September when you can make some money and get more grants for those big babies that are growing as I write.

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This comment is to a drug court worker: She fi- nally got what she wanted, for the one she was after has been sent off . She couldn’t help it and she got sent off . She finally got what she wanted so I hope she is happy now — a kid being sent off for her 16th birthday.

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You are right. I am trying to say something to somebody — to Dream Lover, not to you or not to anyone else. So I am a bad soap opera? You would probably know. You probably spend all day on the couch or in bed watching soap operas and T.V. Maybe you are 300 pounds or are a scrawny person weighing about 90 pounds when you are sober or not drugged out. Keep your comments to yourself about me and my dream lover. We are none of your business and if I want to write my mushy mush, that is fine. If Speak Your Piece is willing to print my mushy mush for my dream lover, than you can put a cork in it.

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I have one thing to say today. The 92-year-old woman who lives on Goose Creek better stop giving people orders to cut trees that don’t belong to her. She doesn’t own anything on Goose Creek; it belongs to her son. She tries to call the power companies and have them cut trees. She doesn’t own the trees above her. She doesn’t own any. Up in the head of Goose Creek is nothing to do with her whatsoever, much less anywhere less. She doesn’t even own a darn tree. She doesn’t own anything. And I want her to quit giving orders to the power company to cut trees here in Goose Creek above her house. The power company shouldn’t take orders from this old 92-year-old woman.

(If you talk to the 92-yearold woman, ask her how she was able to get the power company to cut those trees. Most other people in Letcher County have had little or no success in getting the power company to even show up to look at trees, much less cut them. We’d love to know her secret.)

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Hey hot shot. If I were you I would keep an eye on that good-looking wife of yours. You cheated on her with trash. If you don’t watch, she might try to get even. I’m not sure if she would do that because she is a good person. Just in case you better really keep an eye out for her.

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If anyone out in the neighborhood knows how old you have to be before you quit bleaching your hair blonde, please call Speak Your Piece and let me know. These old women bleach their hair baby blonde so that it stands on their head like a topknot rooster, just yellow as gold. They say they are natural-born blondes, but, children, you don’t stay blonde all of your life. The gray comes in somewhere down the road. So get a grip, women, and act your age.

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There’s a certain guy who works in Whitesburg who seems to never have any money. A drug test could change his method of paying for his drugs.

 Letcher County has figured out how to save money on the roads. We don’t have any ditch lines or drain pipes. The gas company’s roads that come under the county roads wash out. The graders, all they do is grade the gravel off and push them over the hill. We’ve got a sharp crew up there. Let’s hold on to them.

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I think it is a shame if your grandchildren are in foster care and they come to the church where you are, the social workers won’t let the mother get her children back because they spoke to their grandparents at the church. This shows who rules Kentucky; the social workers do.

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I just wonder why so many people go to trouble to get a nurse’s license and then get fired three or four times and can’t keep a job.

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This is to a certain girl who has an attitude: I’ve got news for you. Your husband, my ex, and I gave birth to those two girls. I’ve let you walk with me for years on account of it. No more. They are my babies. They are my grandbabies. You might play the part but you are not and you will not see them anymore.

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No, you are the filthy slut and always have been and still are. As for your lesson that you need to learn, look all around you because you really need to learn one, you slut.

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If you’ve got Allstate Insurance, find something else. Anything will beat Allstate.

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To a 33-year-old girl: Your life is a wreck. You also forgot to point out the fact that you weigh 450 pounds and have warts all over yourself. Thank you. Good-bye.

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I am not opposed to strip mining, but I am opposed to referring to strip mine workers as coal miners. Strip miners are construction workers, and calling them coal miners is an insult to the great heritage of undergound mining in Letcher County. Signed, the wife, daughter and granddaughter of low-coal deep miners.

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To a certain woman: Doesn’t your husband make enough money to support you without you having to be out picking up shingles for your brother-in-law while you are drawing disability? Don’t you think the workers can see you? I am one of the workers and I saw you today. I am wondering if you would like for me to report you to the Social Security office. Then you wouldn’t be drawing your check, you would be out picking up shingles.

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I was watching Mountain News and just saw Stella Parton on there. She needs to go back to where she came from, which is Tennessee. Mountaintop removal is destroying our heritage. It destroys communities. It destroys anything that is in its way. They can justify it any way they want. It is destroying southeast Kentucky. What person wants to come down here for vacation and see the mountains torn apart? The mountains are our heritage. Go underground or go out. That is the way it should be.

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The next time I come in to take care of my relatives and all of this crap starts up, I am going to call the state police. Put this in your pipe and smoke it.

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I was wondering what happened to the paper. It is faded. I can’t read anything in it.

(Sorry. Sounds as if you got a copy that ran while the press wasn’t properly adjusted. Did you receive it by mail or buy it in a store?)

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To the comment about the garbage burning up in Goose Creek: We know who did it, but we really don’t care. If you had something to say about it why didn’t you walk across the road and tell about it instead of going behind someone’s back and putting it in Speak Your Piece? About the comment in Speak Your Piece, we know who did it. You just made a fool out of yourself. From now on if you have something to say, come to us and let’s talk about it. Don’t call the newspaper and put it in Speak Your Piece.

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This is concerning the person who was going to show the man a good time when his divorce was final: If it was concerning a guy on Dry Fork, please respond in next week’s Speak Your Piece.

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I am looking for an attorney who works on a contingency fee basis and who wishes to make a name for himself or herself. You must be willing to stand up for the power and authority of state and county officials and you must have the intestinal fortitude to take on The Mountain Eagle page by page, week by week. If you have the usual credentials and these qualifications, please contact me in next week’s Speak Your Piece. Give me a hint as to your ID and being the pseudointellectual that I am, I am sure I will be able to discern who you are. This is the big MP speaking. Thank you, Speak Your Piece person, for respecting my right to freedom of speech and thank me for respecting your right to freedom of the press.

(The Midnight Phantom reappears. Where have you been all these years?)

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I just want to say that I saw a person the other day that I have known from long ago. They were divorced about 10 years. Last known address was up in Dunham. I just want to say you must be coming out of that divorce because, honey, you are looking good, looking good, looking good.

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Today is Monday. I always think about you on Mondays, hump days and rainy days. You know who I am and I still think about you. If you ever get the chance and feel like you can talk about me, please call. It will be confidential. I love you and I always will.

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I think cops should be like people that work in the coal mines, McDonald’s, Hardee’s, or Wal-Mart. Drive your vehicle to work. Park it. The cops should have to park their cars at the police station and buy their own gas. Can you imagine the tax money we could save by not having to furnish a car for them to go to an from home?

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Has anyone seen Archie Banks? Yeah, I did. I was on vacation out there in California, and I saw him and Jim Ward doing a rehearsal for a new reality show entitled ‘How to Spend Your County’s Money Foolishly.’

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I’m sorry I couldn’t get you a Father’s Day card. I hope you had a wonderful Father’s Day. You’re the best dad a girl could ever ask for. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there with you on Father’s Day. You’ve been there as much as you could be. You never let me down. I’m sorry I’m such a screw-up. One day I’ll get out of prison and we’ll be together again. Your daughter, Rosemary McClain.

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