A few years ago, one of our esteemed Governors said, “Let’s have a state lottery. I will solve all our financial woes and help our schools.” So, we have a lottery. And it doesn’t help. All the schools still have to sell candy bars to stay ahead.
Then another said, “Let’s have off -track betting. It will solve all our money shortage problems and help the schools.” So now you can bet on the horses in many cities across Kentucky.
And it didn’t solve a thing. And the schools had to sell magazine subscriptions to stay ahead.
Then they said, “Let’s have a big tax on cigarettes. Then all our money problems will be over, and it will help the schools.”
And they did. And it didn’t. And the schools had to sell candles to stay ahead.
So someone said, “Let’s all vote on raising the tax on gasoline and oil, and that will solve all our money problems and help the schools.” So they did. And it didn’t help. And the schools had to sell pocket calendars to stay ahead.
So the state went into the hole. And the money kept coming in from the lottery, off-track betting, cigarette and gas taxes. And the state is going broke.
And they said, “We’ve got to do something else. Let’s have casinos in the state.” So they’re planning on where to put the casinos. And the schools are planning on what they can sell next to stay ahead.
Then in today’s paper I see that the state is planning on selling some of its property to get ahead and stay out of the hole. And they say that it will provide even more money for education.
I didn’t know the state had 15 airplanes, did you? They only need one, for the governor.
What are they doing? Are they flying visiting dignitaries all over the state to see our lakes and scenic beauty?
I’ve seen some of these airplanes flying low over Lake Cumberland. Let them drive one of our more than 4,000 state vehicles and save some money.
I wonder how many Cadillacs the state owns.
So what are they going to tax next? I’ve got a solution to the problem, if anyone will listen.
The state can have a special Kentucky Lottery, with a drawing once a week, and cut off the lottery winnings when it gets to $25 million.
Never give away more than $25 million, no matter how many tickets are sold. You’ll still have thousands of people buying tickets, and all that extra money can go into the state treasury.
So, if there’s no winner for a month or two, you’re ahead by several million dollars in ticket sales.
Lower the price of gasoline so we can travel more. The more we travel, the more money we spend.
And to all the politicians who are trying to fix our state money problem, I say this, “When you find yourself going deeper in the hole, stop digging!”